Fear

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I think I've always been a fearful person.  I slept with a light on until... well until I got married, at which point I still wanted a nightlight.  I was afraid of the dark, getting bad grades, bugs and spiders, and my father.  I may have grown up but somehow I brought the fear with me.

Now my fears center around my marriage.  Am I enough for him?  Does he really love me?  Can he really love me?  Will he ever leave me?  Can we make it?  Is divorce inevitable? Am I strong enough for this?  Are we strong enough for this? Why did God allow this?  Is God even with me?  With us?  These thoughts, and many more, swirl around and around inside my head.

I'm trying to not listen to my fears but to listen to the Lord instead.  It's not always easy.  So many times scripture says to have courage and not be afraid.  But it does tell us who to fear - the Lord, not man (Matt 10:28).  And God shows mercy to those that fear him (Ps 103:11, Luke 1:50).  So I'm trying to have a right perspective on fear.

My fearful days playlist:
Warrior
The Breakup Song
Fear is a Liar
I Have This Hope
Even Though
You Make Me Brave
Stand in Your Love
I Am Not Alone
Bulletproof




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