Unexpected Grief

Have you ever been going about your normal routine and WHAM you are crying uncontrollably or just overwhelmed by sadness?  You weren't sad a moment ago.  You may or may not even know what prompted it.  But all of the sudden you feel like you can't even move.  Just me?  Alrighty then....

I recently read an article about grief that made me feel a little less crazy.  The article is specifically talking about grief after death, but as I've mentioned before we now know that all grief works in similar ways.  I have been experiencing what is known as a STUG, a Sudden Temporary Upsurge of Grief.  A STUG is unexpected, threatening, and intense.  It can be accompanied by crying, nausea, vomiting, racing pulse, and feeling like you can't breathe.  Some people compare it to a panic attack.  It leaves you feeling agitated and frightened.  And rightly so - that's an intense physical reaction to grief.

Getting through a STUG is very similar to getting through a panic attack.
Make sure you are somewhere safe - Stop driving, leave the store, get off the phone, whatever you need to do to feel safe.
Slow deep breathing - Allow the pain to come and breathe through it.
Reassuring yourself - Remember that this is temporary and will end soon.
Sleep on it - Getting a good night's sleep after a STUG is important to reset and feel better.